


I'll Be Your Mirror

by Tippytap



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Cute, Embarrassed Killua Zoldyck, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Gen, Love, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Kissing, Platonic Relationships, Protective Gon Freecs, THEY LOVE, Words of Affirmation, they
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25589842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tippytap/pseuds/Tippytap
Summary: I'll be your mirrorReflect what you are, in case you don't knowWhen you think the night has seen your mindThat inside you're twisted and unkindLet me stand to show that you are blindPlease put down your hands'Cause I see you************************Killua has a lot of feelings and insecurities, Gon is there to rebuff them.
Relationships: Gon Freecs & Killua Zoldyck
Comments: 6
Kudos: 61





	I'll Be Your Mirror

**Author's Note:**

> Now I *know* that Gon and Killua are both very gay and probably in love, and I'm down with that.
> 
> BUT, I don't really feel comfortable writing slash, or even implied slash, between *12 year old kids*, so this is all meant to be taken very platonically.
> 
> Title and summary taken from The Velvet Underground song of the same name.
> 
> This can be set at anytime after they get Killua back from the Zoldyck house.

Killua is kicked back, expounding to Gon on the various ways he could improve on his stealth.

Gon isn't really listening. Stealth wasn't ever going to be his strongsuit, so to him, it was better to focus on other things.

But Killua is growing passionate about his subject, using bold expansive gestures to drive his point home.

He's just slightly annoyed that Gon isn't taking this as seriously as he wants him to. This is something, in Killua's opinion, he needs to know in order to stay safe.

Gon is just beaming happily, swinging his legs beside him. He loves to see Killua excited, even when he doesn't always listen closely.

Gon leans over, right in the middle of Killua's speech, and drops a kiss onto the top of Killua's fluffy white head.

No reason really. He was just having such a good time, and loved his friend so much, that the action was unthinking, the most natural thing in the world.

"Hey!" Killua jumps away from him, cheeks reddened. "Don't do that!"

"Why not?" Gon cocks his head in confusion, he kisses Aunt Mito, and all the rest of his friends. Leorio accepts them gleefully, and while Kurapika is more reserved, Gon doesn't miss the way his eyes glow a warm cherry red, just for a moment, every time he receives them.

So why does it bother Killua?

"You do that to people you love, and I love you."

Killua huffs and crosses his arms over his chest, tipping his face away from him, trying to look detached and grown up.

"Don't say stupid things."

Gon smiles then, and Killua immediately regrets reacting, regrets giving him any ammunition.

Gon grabs him up in a tight bear hug, squeezing him, making it impossible for him to escape. No matter how mightily he squirms.

"I _looooove_ you Killua! You're my very best friend. I have so much fun when I'm with you."

He starts rocking him back and forth.

"You are so great. I _LOVE_ YOU."

Killua hisses and scrabbles against his grip like a cat. His face is so hot he's sure he's going to die at any moment.

"Idiot! Let go of me!"

Gon just wraps himself around him tighter, burying his face in his hair. "I know you love me too. So you don't have to say it."

Killua stills then.

"Gon."

Soft, careful, as fragile as he feels.

"Hmmm?"

Killua reaches back, hooking Gon around the neck with his arm. After much squirming and pinching, he manages to get himself turned around. He and Gon are now facing each other, still embraced.

It's far too embarrassing for Killua to handle and he groans frustratedly, hiding his face in the shoulder of Gon's green jacket.

Gon still can't understand why Killua seems to be both upset, _and_ happy with him.

But he rolls with it and waits, stroking a hand through Killua's hair, the fluff that had started this.

Usually he and Killua are always on the same page, working together as if they can read each other's minds. But sometimes things happen with Killua that Gon cannot comprehend, and he's learned that in these moments the best thing for him to do is be quiet and wait for Killua to explain it to him.

So he waits. He would wait forever for Killua. He would do anything for him actually, nothing would be too hard. He just needs to be asked.

"You can't say things like that."

Killua finally speaks, voice muffled against the fabric as he has yet to raise his head.

"Don't do that to me."

"What!? Killua!"

That didn't clear up anything! Gon is even _more_ confused now than before!

_"Because you'll change your mind. One day you will leave me, and I don't want to hear these things in my head when you go."_

But Killua doesn't say this, he can't bring himself to. He simply hugs Gon tighter, even though he knows it's a mistake.…even though it hurts.

"…Killua?"

He doesn't respond, instead scrunching himself tighter into Gon's jacket.

"Killua?"

He shakes his head, slowly.

_"Please no. Gon. Don't ask me to talk right now. Please. Just let me make this memory. Please don't..."_

Because if Gon asks him, he will.

He'll end up spilling everything, staining them both irreparably. He can't deny Gon anything, and they both know it.

But, in a rare moment of wisdom, Gon doesn't push.

"Listen, then."

He smooths the cloth of Killua's shirt, his muscles and tense unyielding under Gon's hands.

"Why don't you want me to say nice things to you? Is it because you think I don't mean them?"

No answer except perhaps a barely perceptible shrug.

"Do you think something's going to happen and I won't like you anymore? That I'll find out something too bad?"

A thought comes to him and his hand clenches subconsciously around Killua's shirt. His voice turning hard from remembered anger, and a desire to protect.

"...is it because of what Illumi said?"

Killua tenses reflexively, and his breathing quickens.

Gon has his answer.

"I see you Killua. Inside of you. There's no darkness in you, not the kind that Illumi means anyway. I deserve you as my friend, and you deserve me! Nobody needs to try and earn each other any more! I'm not going to leave you alone, no matter where we end up. I'm going to stick by you forever, and I'll show you just how great you really are!"

"You sound like you're gearing up for a fight."

Killua has shifted. He still isn't looking at Gon, but at least it doesn't look like he's trying to smother himself anymore.

"I am! Me, against your bad feelings. I'll win too! You know I always do eventually."

He says this with the surety of someone who's lost, and then got back up and won a better fight. His confidence in his abilities to make Killua love himself is absolute.

Gon gives him an extra, comforting, squeeze.

"You'll see."

Killua let's himself be held. Instead of rigidly burying himself against Gon's shoulder, he loosens and the two curl around each other.

Eventually they end up side by side, watching the clouds breeze by, pointing out shapes to each other and making bets on which cloud would go fastest, their hands interlocked between them.

Gon smiles up at him, his face as warm and open as always, and Killua's hand and heart squeeze involuntary.

_"Gon."_

The wind ruffles their hair. It is warm, but it still raises pleasant goosebumps on their skin.

_"I love you."_

_"You are my dearest-….my very dear friend."_

**Author's Note:**

> This was very soft and a lot of fun to write.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
